2012 in words and pictures

2012 was a year in which I had thought no much had happened. Turns out, from going through photos, it was a pretty full year, I just coasted through most of it on auto-pilot while I tried to get my emotional state back in order. In 2012, Kannik and I won multiple awards at FCU in FC2012. Craft creativity was limited to carving a few heads I didn't do anything with. I got fat, and realized that I hated my career path. I found that taking pictures to be getting harder and harder as I constantly hated the pictures I took, while looking at others' growth and thinking "What the Fuck?". Aside from cons, the only big event was going to China and training at Shaolin Temple, which was pretty momentous in and of itself. I also started a jazz band, The SuperPack, which has been practicing all year for a performance at FC 2013.

For 2013, I'll get back into crafting things, be they more fursuits, or just other 'things'. I have more fursuits than I know what to do with at this point, so I'm either going to have to sell some of what I have, or just work on stuff for other people. I'll continue my trumpet playing, and hopefully find some way to practice without needing the practice mute, which is killing my tone. I'll try to get over my fear of taking photos (and general fear of doing anything at all). There are hopefully some career improvements on the horizon as well, given time. And lastly, I'll get back into biking, and stop eating (and drinking) everything in sight.

And now, 2012 in pictures (and one video I didn't make). I apologize for the length, but I post this once a year, so sorry, no LJ Cut. :P


My China Journal

Finally have some time to post this...

TL;DR version

Full photo set: http://www.flickr.com/photos/29314661@N02/sets/72157630892932986/

THE PLACES: Really neat, culturally. We went to Beijing, Deng Feng/Shaolin, Wudang Mountain, and Xi'an. I saw Tiananmen Square, Forbidden City, the Summer Palace, part of the Great Wall, Shaolin Temple (and got to join morning prayers there), Mount Song and Da Mo's cave, the stone buddhas of Longmen Grottoes, White Horse Temple, Wudang's Temples (Purple Cloud, Golden, Cliffside, Fuzhen), Xi'an's City Wall, the Terracotta Warriors, The Great Mosque of Xi'an, and Big Goose Pagoda.

THE FOOD: A Big disappointment. Very little of it felt authentic, and most of it was very Westernized (orange chicken, french fries, sweet and sour), with the exception of Wudang Mountain, which was the best tasting by far. I didn't try any street food because I wasn't up to date on my shots, and I was already having gastric issues. Food stores were EXACTLY like Ranch 99/Generic Asian Supermarket.

THE KUNG FU: The workouts were strenuous but very good, and left me feeling good. I learned 3 sets, and might even remember parts of two of them, with a little prodding and practice. I came back feeling a little less flabby due to all the walking/working out/sweating, and it apparently showed, as I got a few compliments.

THE PEOPLE: The Chinese were exceedingly friendly, and loved to wave and say HALLOO! They were tickled pink every time you replied with "Ni Hao!" The street vendors were everywhere and super annoying, but I got used to them by Shaolin/Deng Feng. Beijing and Xi'an were 'shining' examples of BIG CITY LIFE, which I can do without.

For those who like reading, here's the journal in full.

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Furries in the Wild 2012

The day after I got back from China, and horribly not caught up on sleep after a 52 hour or so transit, I went to Furries in the Wild 2012 and took pictures and drank a lot. Once again I brought the Jaguar and didn't wear him. What jaguar, you ask? I have a jaguar fursuit that I haven't worn yet. Just haven't felt the urge to suit the last...4 times I've taken him somewhere.

Anyway, pictures!


As far as China, I'm working on transcribing my journal now, so I'll have a huge Journal entry with text and pictures and everything. The pictures are actually already up, so you can dig for them, but I'll post them again in a couple days.


Staying the course...

First non-photo update in a while.

Life meanders on. Bean's Birthday is tomorrow. Califur is next weekend (I'm going down with Kiteless and Mr. Glenn). My trip to China is coming up in July. I'm bailing on Burning Man. Work sucks as much as ever, and as soon as I get back from China, I'm looking for a new job.

Emotion-wise, I've been feeling like a zombie lately. I go home, I sit on the couch, and I want to go back to bed rather than do anything. I thought my medication was zombifying me, but after talking to the shrink, they suggested that what I had was textbook depression. So I went and saw another shrink, who's helping me actively change my perception of irrational thoughts, and I have to say, so far, it's helping. It's akin to looking in the mirror every morning and saying "I like you." We'll see how far it takes me.

Been bouncing from video game to video game lately. I tried Reckoning: Kingdoms of Amalur, but that game is painful and boring to play. The dungeons are all the same, the monsters always get in cheap shots, and the combat system feels like you're an untrained monkey swinging bushels of heavy bananas. It sucks balls, yet I played it for a good 15 hours before I threw it down in disgust. D3 came out, and I played that to level 14, until I realized it was boring the piss out of me. It's pretty and perfectly polished, but it's D2 all over, and I played too many hours of that to count. So I ordered a used copy of Skyrim. Interesting game. It feels clunky, though, and the pathing of the critters is a bit wibbly. I'm enjoying it more than D3, anyway, and playing it a fair bit more, but it's still not really holding my attention.

On the costuming front, I'm working on a pair of bird partials for Kiteless and I. One head is about half done, the other not even started. Making costumes again is...daunting. In fact, I think the daunting nature may have led to an upsurge of anxiety and depression. I look at these things and think "There's no way I can make this work. Picardy was a fluke." But I guess that's why I'm seeing a behavioral specialist, so they can convince me that this is the wrong way to think about it. I've been actively telling myself that it will all turn out, and it's actually helping a little bit. I've gone from making a handful of stitches in a day to actually getting large portions of work done. This is progress.

I'll cut off the verbal diarrhea there. In short, life is alright.


Extremely long, vivid dream.

I had an extremely vivid series of dreams last night that I remember nearly perfectly, so I'm going to write them down here for posterity. :P

It started with a visit to some large city with my parents and brother. We arrived miraculously, as these things occur, and I had my large suitcase in tow behind me. After some puttering around, I laid the suitcase on the ground, opened it, and get into it, because it was my Mustang, except that it was still a suitcase. So the family piles into my MustangSuitcase and we go rumbling down the street, and into a parking garage (I have dreams about parking garages a lot). We dodge a few police cars, and see police officers running around with AK47s. That's okay, the altercation is obviously over. Except it wasn't, and as the parking garage becomes a large mall-ish building full of people, we end up in the middle of a firefight between the cops and guys with orange shirts. For some reason, my family vanishes, and I'm right in the middle. I get shot in the hand (human in this dream), look at the oddly painless wound, and then run for my life, while bullets go flying through the wall right in my path. I get shot, but it has no lasting effect, and I suddenly find myself in a back room, talking to an old coworker, a small asian woman. There's a bed, and some other guy there, and a table with refreshment. Turns out I was wearing an orange shirt, which was the same color shirt the terrorists were wearing, so the cops were shooting at me. Not a problem.

Magically, I'm now standing among great, green fields and hills, with towns and fields and whatnot scattered about. I'm in a car, and I'm driving, rather dangerously, down these hills and through these fields, so that I can get to work. When I finally make it, I'm a security guard in an underground complex that looks like a random assortment of pillars and lowered areas almost like a sewer. I think it's still a mall, because at one point I end up in a store that sells terrorist propaganda, except it's cartoon terrorists, like COBRA, from GIJoe. I end up at the very end of this mall complex, on extended duty, with a partner. I end up distracted by the old computer they have for us to use, and I play old vectorized video games until my partner gets suspicious that I'm not actually working. Oops, time to turn it off and pretend to do work again.

Again, magically, the setting changes. I'm in a fursuit (I'm not quite sure which) and I'm surrounded by my family, except now I have THE CUTEST three little brothers, all of them in red dog fursuits, though I think they might actually have been red dogs. They were adorable. I don't remember why, they just were. We're back in the mall, and there's a big line of people getting their picture's taken. Well, the 3 kids run off somewhere (possibly with the rest of the family, because they disappeared, too), I'm not sure where, but I wait in line, because I really want my picture taken with them, and I'm thinking of all sorts of adorable poses their big brother can do with them. At some point in line, someone makes a comment about a spider, that I should get rid of that think before it cuts me, and I look down, and there's this HUGE spidery insect with razor-sharp scythe-legs that skitters off me and sort of wanders off down the stairs. No harm, no foul, right? For some reason I'm too terrified to squish it. I end up getting to the front of the line, and my 3 brothers are still nowhere to be seen. I start freaking out because I've lost them, and all I have are the memories, and boy am I going to be in trouble with mom.

And that's where it ends.

I don't know why I still remember that in vivid detail. I often remember snippets, but it's rare that it's that clear in my head. :P


Selling stuff, is this thing on?

Anyone wanna buy a used MacBook aluminum unibody, Mountain Lion-Ready? How about a set of Beats Dr Dre Solo headphones, or a 85mm f/1.4 Nikon lens? Or some Zoids 1/72 high end models?

Does anyone even read this anymore, anyway?



I recently made a post about putting up some more photos from the past 3 years. I finally got up and did it. There's two albums, one of people (and fursuits) and one of animals and things. They're not necessarily my finest photos, but they were all amusing moments, or something I recall that elicits some sort of excitement.

I hope you enjoy them, as much as I enjoyed reliving the memories as I went through these albums.

Animals and Things: http://www.flickr.com/photos/29314661@N02/sets/72157629876998603/with/6957622994/

People: http://www.flickr.com/photos/29314661@N02/sets/72157629512519980/with/6957588244/


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Frolic pictures are up.


I wasn't feeling the magic this time. Between being depressed for various reasons, feeling it was overcrowded, being tired from my new sleep schedule, and from being completed pissed at the people who take 10-15 minutes to change and get the fuck out of the fursuit closet, I just never got into my groove, and just spent the night trying to see the same type of shots I saw last time. I got MAYBE 1 picture I'm happy with. The rest are terrible.